Jazz music usually reminds everyone of the same elevator tunes that we find excruciatingly annoying. However, I have a slight obsession with it. It’s not only the beauty of an orchestra synchronizing their beats to produce lilting music, but also the fact that pure jazz music is nothing but improvisation. Most musicians don’t rehearse before concerts, and the tunes are made up right there on stage. It’s just a blend of a few basic music rules, creativity, and coordination amongst the orchestra.
Improve Your Parenting Skills
This makes it easy for me to compare jazz music with parenting skills. Just like every tune, every child is different, and parents need to adapt their ways to suit the means of their child. However, a few basic rules always stand true. These parenting skills are easy to understand and much easier to follow.
1. Setting a Live Example:
Most children have a stronger visual cognition, which means they learn faster if they see something happening. One should remember to “show, not tell.” For example, if you merely tell your child to be polite to others, there’s going to be lesser of an impact. But if you implement it, your child will adapt to the same behavior over time.
This method can work in a variety of situations. Telling them to clean their room might not work as well as it would if you show them that you clean your room every weekend.
2. Manage Your Stress:
While children are cute and hilarious, their constant whining and wailing can understandably drive you up to the wall. Usually, parents are pretty good at ignoring these little quirks. But sometimes, stress due to external causes can factor in when they look for a suitable punishment. They end up dumping their frustration on their child, even if it is only a minor fault of his. A small fact to remember: punishments don’t discipline your child. Calling them names won’t teach them how to correct their behavior. Instead, tell them what they’re doing wrong and what consequences may occur upon them if they continue behaving in that manner.
Managing your stress is an essential thing to as a parent. There are tons of support groups, breathing exercises, and even inspirational videos available online that can help you overcome stress.
3. Consequences For Bad Behavior:
Children cannot be expected to understand what’s wrong or right from the beginning. However, if they aren’t made to understand that their actions have consequences, they start to take their parents for granted. Consistent consequences must be implemented if you want to discipline your child. If they waste their meal, refuse to give them more food until they understand what hunger feels like, and how the less fortunate have to suffer every day. If they don’t clean their rooms even after repeated instructions to do so, don’t do it for them. Let them realize how stinky the room gets if it is left unclean.
Experiential knowledge prepares them for future situations as well. If it is ingrained since childhood, they will always remember that all their actions will have certain consequences, good or bad. They will be more careful about the decisions they make and thus ensure a more sorted out life for themselves.
4. Build a Healthy Relationship With Your Spouse:
Research shows that happy home results in a happier child. While quarrels are a part of every marriage, its best to solve them behind closed doors and away from your child’s prying ears.
- Focus on the trouble at hand rather than playing the blame game. Try to find a solution instead of merely arguing.
- Keep in mind that your relationship is a hundred times more important than the urge to be right.
- It’s completely alright to accept defeat and apologize if you know it is your fault.
- Make an effort to be kind and polite to your spouse at all times.
Children need equal love and support from both parents in order to develop happier personalities. Make sure you set aside specific hours during the day as “family time.” This will promote healthier relations and a wholesome environment within the family and help you all grow together.
5. Try To Avoid Shouting:
Most parents take to shouting when they want their kid to stop doing certain things. However, this does less to discipline your child and even lesser for your stress levels. Studies show that the more you shout, the more their conduct worsens. They start believing that they are a bad child, and there’s nothing they can do about it. They stop making an effort to improve their behavior, and they conform to their existing bad habits.
A more effective parenting skill would include understanding their perspective. Then coming up with a logical reason to explain why you think they’re wrong. Avoid anger flares and be aware of the fact that they are new to this world and are unable to identify with the consequences of their actions.
These usually serve only as base rules and often have to be modified in order to suit a specific child. A particularly fussy child would require a more strict approach, while a more easy-going child can be shown a little more leniency. In the end, do remember that every child is different, and most importantly, remember to celebrate these differences.